I am sitting here on the couch trying to decide what to do with my time. Kaylee is upstairs trying to open the door saying "mommy....mommy" and now knocking on the wall. It is 1:30pm and definitely past her nap time. Connor is asleep on our bed but has been for the last hour 1/2 or so, so I know as soon as I close my eyes to take a nap he will start crying. I have homework I need to do but don't have the desire or energy or time to do it all and I don't want to get started and then have Connor wake up because it will be hard to come back to my train of thought again tonight-which will be the next time I will be able to work on it again.
Life is just crazy.
I am very grateful that I got into the online RN-BSN program and truly do think it is the right thing for me to be doing right now, but that doesn't mean it is going to be easy or fun all the time. I guess I just have to keep reminding my self that because I am already second guessing it. The online blackboard system Weber has is lame and overwhelming. But I am sure as time comes I will get the hang of it. The only time I really have to study is at night so the past two night I have been up till around midnight and then just as I fall asleep Connor wakes up to eat. Needless to say I am EXHAUSTED already. Not to mention when the kids go to bed is usually when BJ and I get time to talk and spend time together. Instead it is him watching sports while I work on homework. Blah
I am also feeling overwhelmed with everything else I have and want to do (blog, clean the house, fulfill my calling in church, read my scriptures, go to the temple, make dinner for my family and even things as simple as getting my hair done for the day). What I am trying to do is this:

*Wake up with Connor and while he is playing read my scriptures (I made a rule that I can't get on Facebook unless I have already read my scriptures- I know how lame is that, that I actually have to do that).
* Play with the kids and try not to get on the computer much during the day
* Go to the gym a few times a week in the morning between 8-11 so Connor will sleep and Kaylee wont be starving while they hang out in the play area there.
* Work on Cub Scouts on Tuesdays and Sundays
* I am just deciding this now- but clean the house Saturday morning with just straightening up and sweeping on and off throughout the weekday so the house doesn't look horrible.
* Really make an effort to have a date night with BJ on Friday night. Even if it is watching a movie at home when the kids are in bed.

Now that leaves me still with working on the blog, going to the temple, finding time to get my hair done (I know it doesn't sound like something that should be hard. But imagine Connor in the other room crying because his sister is teasing him or because he is lonely because Kaylee is in the bathroom with me pulling the toilet paper off the roll and flushing the toilet over and over again saying "Mommy...mommy....mommy." while reaching up to be like me and straighten her hair or put hairspray on her hair. She still doesn't understand how hot my straightener is no matter how much I tell her. I know she will learn when she touches it but I don't want her to learn that way. ").

** So I just found this post. This must have been one of those "hard mommy days". Two kids is definitely a challenge. But I have to say- it is also a huge blessing! These past few weeks the kids have been amazing. I have said on many occasions "We have the cutest kids! We are so blessed!" Motherhood definitely has its ups and downs. But the ups definitely make up for the downs!