A Happy Home is Filled with Love and Laughter: Help!

Help!

Beej & Chris

Ok I need some mommy advice. Connor is now 3 months old (well...in a few days). By this time Kaylee would sleep for 8 hours at night and wake up once to eat and then sleep for another 4 hours with a few small naps throughout the day. I know I know all kids are soo different which is why I am asking for help. Connor does sleep for 6-7 hours at a time but then is up every 3 "snacking". I am ok with that. Sure the 8 hours and then 4 would be AWESOME but we can't be spoiled like that with every child now can we? :) What I am struggling with is that Connor seems to be soo tired all day long but will only sleep when I am holding him. He hates the car seat and does NOT fall asleep in the car. He will scream and scream and scream until we either get to the location and get him out or stop and rock him to sleep and then put him back in the car seat. I know that is not ideal- but I can't stand hearing that tiny baby cry while I am driving. I just feel too bad.
I have tried getting Connor calm and taking him up to his bed and letting him fall asleep on his own with me standing right there next to him. I have even sat there and held his hand or tried putting my hand on his tummy letting him know I am still there. But as soon as I lay him down he screams. I tried waiting it out but he will just scream and scream and scream until he has worked himself up an appetite and then will eat and fall asleep in my arms. The only way he will let me set him down is if he is in a deep sleep otherwise he will wake up as soon as I lay him down. He used to fall asleep in the swing but will no longer do that either.
I love cuddling and miss Kaylee cuddling with me so I am trying to enjoy this as much as I can, but I have Kaylee to take care of as well not to mention all the housework that never gets done.
Any advice would be most appreciated. Thank you!

Ryan G said :

September 23, 2011 at 8:54 AM

I got the book "secrets of the baby whisperer: how to calm, comfort, and communicate with your baby". I really got it because it was recommended on baby center .com for putting a baby on a schedule. I got it and a few others from the library (including Dr. Ferber's book and 'healthy sleep habits healthy child'.) I actually never read the "healthy sleep habits" one because I liked baby whisperer so much. Her techniques are what got Malcolm to sleep on his own. It's not a cry it out method either. But it's not easy. I had to work with Malcolm for 2 hours straight the first night. She talks a lot about following your baby's cues so you get to them before they're beyond tired. It's also not a huge book with lots to read so it wasn't like, "I can't read a whole freaking book! just give me the info!"
But good luck! It still doesn't always work with Malcolm because he so frequently sleeps in odd places during the day because I'll be out and about and such.

Ryan G said :

September 23, 2011 at 8:55 AM

oh, I"m logged in as Ryan! Ha! That was of course, all me, Ashley.

the laytons. said :

September 23, 2011 at 10:53 AM

brin liked "white noise". Maybe you can try turning on a fan or just finding a fuzzy channel on the radio. That has always helped brin calm down and go to sleep. i dont know! good luck!

Nina said :

September 25, 2011 at 5:40 PM

Eric used to wake up a lot to eat at that age too. I know it won't work for every baby, but I know that Connor takes the binky too; so with Eric, when he would start stirring at night like he was going to wake up to eat, I would get there as fast as I could and put in his binky. If he was still half asleep, the binky would usually help him get back to sleep for another hour or so. Then when he would wake up, he would be REALLY hungry, rather than waking up to snack or out of habit, and would eat better. I kept doing it until he got in the habit of sleeping from about 10pm to 4am, then he would usually go back to sleep until about 7am by 3 1/2 to 4 months. Waking up only once makes it a lot easier on Mom! It makes you sleep less initially because every sound you worry is him, but Eric caught on pretty quick, after about a week. :) Hope that helps!

Julie said :

September 26, 2011 at 11:53 AM

My second child did not sleep through the night till he was older than two. He had alot of ear infections so he would not lay flat and when he would eat (especially at night) he would fall asleep eating so he would be up every two hours hungry all night long. Soooo these are some of my tricks. during the day I tried to keep him up as much as I could and he like to be upright so instead of holding him all day I put him in one of those baby backpacks on the front of me so I could get things done and take care of Nicole. also some of this, at least with my son was habits and spoiled behavior like wanting to be held all of the time, so sometimes you just have to let them cry and learn to self-soothe a little, this is really hard to do because it breaks your heart. My doctor said do not let them cry for longer than 20 minutes at a time, but I think this was at 2 years old, so I am sure it is less with a younger baby. I also had a white noise bear that had a heart beat that it played and propped up the head of his crib a little with a pillow between the mattress and springs so that he was not laying all the way flat.

Julie said :

September 26, 2011 at 11:56 AM

p.s. also with both of my kids I started feeding them a little bit of rice cereal at night at around 3 months. I think they say you can still start around then now, but I am not sure so check it out!